Daily Tips for Back to School Success

Tip #1: Smile at Your Kids

The beginning of the school year is stressful for everyone. Families have a new (though familiar) routine, kids are navigating a new grade, there is all the school-bag packing, getting everyone there on time etc. A simple way to reduce stress during this time is to stop and smile at your kids. It reduces stress all around because you can't be mad if you are smiling, and it also makes the other person feel good, which in turn makes you feel good. We are all so caught up in our head and worried about things, stopping to smile is a quick win for all.

Tip #2 Get Everyone Outside

Study after study explored the benefits of being outside.

When you are outside and look at the sky, you see and feel the space, the expansiveness. This extra space, after being cooped up in the classroom, reduces stress and anxiety. Blue is also a calming color and just looking at the sky can reduce stress. Getting in some physical activity after sitting all day reduces stress and brings out those positive endorphins. Fall is still fairly warm out, so step out and take advantage of it!

Tip #3 Encourage Independence

As a teacher, the kids who grew the most over the year where the ones that would try to solve their own problems and be independent. Whatever chance you have at home to let your kids learn to be independent goes such a long way towards their success in school. This can be any time they create something, figure out the steps for how to do something or get themselves ready for the next step. Encourage them and praise their efforts - even if you could have done it quicker, easier or more correctly. We have to let go sometimes, and the resulting growth is worth it.

Tip #4 Talk Through Transitions

During the school day, your child goes through a multitude of transitions, from leaving the house to getting on the bus, then off, then getting to their classroom etc. While those seem to be straightforward, they are stressful. Talking through each, and what steps they can take to handle them, eases worry and gives them confidence. During the school day, they move from activity to activity, and room to room. As a teacher, getting the kids settled down after they came in the room was always a challenge. Preparing your child ahead of time for these transitions improves their focus and success in school.

Tip #5 Make a Plan to Reduce Anxiety

The last tip talked about transitions and being prepared for them. Now, I want to talk about making plans to reduce anxiety. Did you know that any situation that produces a negative emotion is stressful, and increases anxiety and cortisol putting physical stress on your body as well as mental stress? Discussing and planning for the stressful situations that can happen during the school day, at home or with friends, can help your child reduce anxious emotions.

Tip #6 Say "No" to Extra Commitments

Back to school time brings along lots of extra time commitments, from homework, to sports, committees, invitations etc. Many years ago when I was trying to reduce the stress in my life, I started purposefully blocking off space in my calendar, and turning down invitations and extra projects. We ended up loving all the free time we had as a family to just focus on ourselves and what we wanted to do. In the end, no one missed any of the extras that we said "No" to. It is hard, and a pat phrase like "I'm sorry, we are not able to come/help," will give you confidence to do this. Start with just one "No" per week and see how much it can help reduce stress and expectations on you and your family.

Tip #7 Support Homework

I get it, homework takes time and is often a battle, especially if your child doesn't understand what to do. Every day, your child receives instruction in multiple topics. Homework is meant to help them remember and practice skills to support what they will learn the next day. If they have science at 10 am, and don't have it again until 10am the next day, so much has happened in between, they are less likely to remember what they learned. Anything you can do, even a short discussion about the topic, will help them retain knowledge. Linking the information to a story about something that happened to you, or in the world, will help even more. Some skills, like math, need physical practice as well as mental, though mental practice like them teaching you how do something is great as well!

Tip #8 Play This or That to Discuss Situations

The students in my classes always loved to play "This or "That, otherwise known as "Would You Rather." It was lots of fun, promoted lots of discussion and was an easy way to address a topic. Usually when you ask your child how school went today, the answer is crickets. By using this method, they are more likely to respond. For example: Would you rather spend time with your math or science teacher? Do you like learning about earthworms or space? Making it more of a game (even involve the whole family and take sides to defend) can help bring some fun into the discussion and get kids to open up more.

Tip #9 Frozen Pizza is Better Than Drive Thru

I once worked with a mom who said they were so busy, they ate frozen pancakes for dinner each night. All I could think of was the sugar and zero nutrition. Most families I know, opt for the drive thru on busy nights. If you have the chance to be home for at least a half hour, frozen pizza is a much more nutritious and less expensive option. Frozen pizza has less fat, calories, and sugar than drive-thru food, and it's easy to add some healthy sides, such as cut up vegetables, fruit, or a bagged salad. Even on a restricted diet, half a pizza is better than a Big Mac meal :)

Tip #10 Prepare Kids for the Unexpected

Many kids have a hard time with the unexpected changes that happen in their lives - from the bus being late, to grandparents coming over after school as a surprise, teachers asking them to do something, teachers being out sick, seating chart changes, after school pick up changes, and event cancellations. Talking through what could happen tomorrow or the upcoming week, and making a plan for how to handle it if it does, can ease your child's anxiety and worry, plus help them feel confident that they know what to do if the unexpected does happen.

Tip #11 Know What you Can and Can't Control

We can only control ourselves and our actions/reactions. We can't control what our friends do or say, what our teacher does or says, or what is required of us by others. The sooner your child can understand their sphere of influence and how to navigate it, the easier time they will have accepting others, dealing with friends, and handling school pressures. Spending time talking about this in relation to what happened during their day, can help them better prepare for the next.

I hope some of these tips have been helpful for you as you and your family traverse the first month of school this year. Take time for yourself as well so you have the mental and physical capacity to support your family.